she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
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