Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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