I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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