Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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