dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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