whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
