The best revenge is premature balding
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
