Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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