Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Randomize
