if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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