she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
You ate ashes out of my bong