I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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