i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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