garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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