I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Randomize