Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
it hurts more in the daytime
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
