I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
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