Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize