finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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