Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
