so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
You're like the curious george of whores
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Randomize
