yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
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