I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
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