Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Randomize
