Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize