i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
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