tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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