Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize
