i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
