i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
