Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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