Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
Randomize
