I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize
