we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
