Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
i came on her dog
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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