you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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