it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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