Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
