just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Randomize
