I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
And then he peed in my hair
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
