I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Randomize
