matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
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