If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
She told me I should be a condom model.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
