Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize