D3 body, D1 cock
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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