dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Randomize
