I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize