I got chris browned last night
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize