I'd wear matching sweaters with you
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Randomize
