i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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