He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
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I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
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Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
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