umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
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