Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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